When I moved to Boston in 2006, I was 24, and used to nothing but Southern California optimism and good vibes. Within a couple months my happy-go-lucky nature almost got me into 4 bar fights. Over the next half a decade Boston stamped out my remaining positive energy and any inclination to approach a stranger as a friend. I had adapted. New England changed me.

I wanted to see the Patriots do the same thing to the Bolts Sunday. I was looking forward to the Patriots wiping the smile off the Bolts 3 game win streak with a good old fashioned Brady-Belichik beat down. But for some reason the Pats played down to the Chargers level. Deep incompletions into double coverage, boring check-downs to RBs, missed field goals. It was infuriating. This was the ONE time I could cheer for the best QB and coach of all time, and they were blah. It would be like Luke joining the Dark Side seconds before the Death Star blows up.

I watched the game from my old apartment in Southie with my former roommate who commented “The Chargers have played just as well as the Patriots, they’ve just done very stupid things.” So we still have that going for us. And bless Travis Benjamin’s heart. He is the reigning “Special Teams Player of the Week” , and he deserves that award less than OJ deserves his Heisman. Travis Benjamin fielded a punt on the 7 yard line, ran backwards into the end zone where he was immediately tackled for a safety. I’m still laughing about it. Oh Travis you fast dumb goofball.

Oh yeah and Melvin Gordon is also fast. He ran for an 87-yard TD. Whoopdy doo. I was in the bathroom when it happened. Other things, let’s see…

• Gronk caught a TD. He might break Gates’ career TE record if no one slays him with a sling.
• Jahleel Addae was super pumped for some reason and continues to be a danger to all around him.
• Mike Williams is not that good and probably never will be.
• Tyrell Williams got a couple TDs called back because he’s not a good receiver either.
• Joey Bosa is a beast and I resent that the Bolts finally have a pass rush and I can’t enjoy it.
• Brady knows how to avoid sacks and protect his pretty face.
• Philip Rivers shook his head in disgust at his teammates, and I was like “I know right?”

The Bolts have been in every game this year, and none have been fun to watch. Sloppy play. Mental errors. Uninspired offensive schemes. If not for the humiliating losses this whole season would be a waste.

Jono Zalay is a native San Diegan and co-host of the F*** The Chargers podcast, available on iTunes and all those other places. He now lives in Los Angeles where he can hate the Chargers from close proximity.